(Let me warn you, if your not ready for some mushy love stuff, don't read this post!)
In the last LDR (Long Distance Relationship) post about Zach & I, I mentioned a few ways to keep things normal. I also mentioned that I am slowly discovering things about myself that I do with out Zach. I've grown to realize that in the past few months Zach has become a part of my identity, a part of who I am. I am now a girlfriend. I've always liked being a girlfriend because I get into Suzie Homemaker mode. I've always hated being a girlfriend because I get into Suzie Homemaker mode. After the end of my previous relationship, I stayed single for over 4 years. At first it wasn't by choice, then I enjoyed being single, then near the end (before I met Zach) I guess I knew I was ready.
When Zach & I first started dating, I was terrified when he'd mention the future. It scared the crap outta me. It was nice to have someone to watch movies with & a new person to get to know...because we really did like each other...but I didn't want to rush into anything. I just had 4 years of being able to develop who I am, I didn't want to sacrifice it by becoming too close to someone. So when we first met, I was as giddy as a school girl thinking whether or not we'd fall in love, etc. Then it hit me one day that I might be sacrificing who I was to be with him..so I sorta closed myself off. But I couldn't stop falling for him more & more. One day I realized we were great for each other & that he was bringing out the best parts of the person I'd become. It was then I knew that I couldn't imagine being with anyone else.
|Made using the iPhone app Phoster|
So, what is this post about? It's about the fact that he just gets me. I feel comfortable around him, more comfortable then I do around some of my friends. He cares about my blog while some of the people in my everyday life don't really get it. I am embarrassed to take outfit photos in front of my room mates but not in front of Zach. He's even taken some for me. Zach is so patient with me & even held all my cameras when I was switching off in Michigan.
I guess what I am saying is I've never been so completely comfortable & trusting with someone before. Being so terrified in the beginning and now having him gone has made me realize what a part of my life he is. This blog got a bit more exciting when I had someone to do things with! Now I just feel sorta lame!
But this time is a time for us to discover who we are with out the other person being in our day to day life. One of the comments (Kenzie from Bean and Bear) said
I already knew I was attracted to him, but with long distance we now get to see if we can be friends and build up our friendship, which is going to last way longer than any puppy love attraction.
And I whole heartedly agree!