I've been a bit preoccupied with memories lately. I've just been having a lot flashback memories lately stimulated by everyday things. Sometimes these memories are pretty everyday things - I remember sandals my grandparents bought me one time after our shoes shrunk in the dryer for example. Just random things - the sand at the lake where we would vacation, the way the moon shone through the window in my childhood bedroom. I could go on, but I'm not going to. This post is about the scariest things I've ever done in my life. Not really the most terrifying things that have happened to me but more like the scariest choices I've ever made. I'm sort of doing them in order of events because, of course, that's how I remember them when I think back on the scariest things I've ever done.
The first time I repelled down the side of anything
When I was thinking about this blog post I wanted to do something a long the lines of 3 of the Scariest things I've done because the two I could think of really didn't make for a good read. Two is a weird number to do a list post with - so I thought of this. And the fact that it was the scariest thing I'd ever done prior to the last two really says something about my decision making skills. Anyway, when I was in high school I had a friend who was in a coed division of the boy scouts. I joined the group & it happened that one of the common things we did was go rock climbing & repelling. I learned to belay before learning to climb or repel but I didn't really think about the interaction between everyone in this chain of people here. So the scariest thing my high school self ever did was look into someones eyes & hang over a rock face. It was pretty scary - but nothing compared to growing up & making these other decisions. But if I'd never hung over the side of that rock I would never have reached the bottom. When I did I promptly ran back up & did it again. Success feels great.
Changing my Major 2 years into College, Changing it to Art
This was terrifying not only because I knew there wasn't really a job waiting for me at graduation but also because I was so intimidated. I did not want to show up to my first art class with the wrong sketchbook. I had this idea that I was joining a group of people who already knew what they were doing - this feeling has actually held me back from a lot of things in my life, honestly. Well, come to find out it's not the sketchbook that matters it's what you do with it. I realized that the greatest artists were at once amateurs (someone said this once, I don't remember who!). I also realized that I could spread my talent while also being at the top of my game. The hardest & some of the best 3 years of my life we're the last 3 years of my college experience. If it weren't for my determination I don't think I would ever be where I am today. I changed my major because I wanted to do something that I was good at, that I would succeed at. I dedicated other parts of my life to gaining job experience like, well, getting jobs & gaining experience. I realized that all a college degree shows is that you took the time to dedicate 4 years (or 5 in my case) to something.
Moving 800 Miles Away from Everything I Ever Knew
At the time my move up to Michigan, ending here in Indiana wasn't that scary. I knew I was going to do it and I knew it was going to happen. It was the looking back on it & realizing that Zach & I had only known each other about 8 or 9 months (period) before I decided to move from Virginia. Even more surprising (read terrifying) is that we essentially bought a house together & closed on in 3 days before we'd been together for a year. (I say essentially because I was mainly consulted on the deal, agreed, and made sure no papers got lost in the process. Oh & I had a big hand in painting the down stairs..anyway.....) Seriously, can you believe that? I was so confident before, during, and after the move it was only about the Summer of 2013 that I was talking to my Dad & I realized 'what the actual hell did I do?!?!' Of course not in a bad way, but in a self reflective way. In way where I'd realized how much I'd grown & finally realized how young I was a year ago. I guess in this instance the memory was the scariest thing I'd ever remembered because when it was happening it was the best thing ever. Confidence is the key.
These are the three scariest things I've ever done in my life. I wanted to share these thing with you not only so you get to know me a little better but so I can document my journey which is what Five Sixteenths is about - living a creative (& sometimes self reflective) life.
What are they scariest things you've done in your life? Have you ever made a decision & then looked back on it realizing how crazy you were?