What Does Your Best Self Look Like?

We're nearly half way through the January Journaling Jump Start!  Who's excited about how their personal reflection & word planning is going?  Today I wanted to jump off of the second week of prompts which involve planning who we want to be in 2018.  I mentioned in the first JJJS post that I like to focus on how I want to feel versus what I physically/materially want to gain.  I find that makes me more successful.  So I asked myself this question - what does my best self look like?

There is an exercise I heard about somewhere, at some point in time - specific, I know.  Basically I was asked to consider what my best self looked like.  Since I've heard that question, I've done a bit here and there to work with what that person is.  Its about finding words that are positive & encouraging, words that focus on growth, and words that focus on feelings.  It's about finding words to build up confidence and self worth.

It's not about self deprecating words, words that may have a mentally negative impact, or words that tear you down.  If you feel uninspired by the words you're using to describe the best you or feel that you can't achieve that version of yourself......try using different words!  For example - my best self is skinnier, prettier, has less debt, has better skin.  Those words don't inspire action in me.  They make me feel that I am failing.

Its about positive, actionable words.  Your best self does the actionable things towards those ends.  My best self does 10 minutes of yoga in the AM, eats her veggies everyday, maintains her skin care routine, saves $200 each month.  These are things that are actionable and positive.  These things make me feel successful because I can take action towards those ends each day, week, & month.  

This is sort of a hard concept to explain, but I hope it's made a bit of sense!  Focusing on the feelings we want to attract to ourselves will give us the inspiration to be those things.  Its all about raising our thoughts to meet where we want to be.  So if the best you does 10 minutes of yoga in the morning, drinks more water, and eats her veggies....then the best you is also working on her fitness.  If the best you purchases one coffee a week, brings her lunch to work, and saves $200 a month.....the best you is also reducing her debt and in control of her finances.  The key is to remember how these actions make you feel.  You feel more energized, you feel less money stress, etc.  How do these small things affect the big things in your life?  Little by little, small things add up to big changes.  And you have the whole year to see the shift!

That is one thing I need to remember - doing yoga, drinking water, and eating well makes me feel awesome and not lethargic & lazy.  I fall out of routine easy because I don't have the end in mind when focusing on the small things!  So during the January Journaling Jump Start make sure you're thinking about positive & actionable things and you're keeping the end feeling in mind.  Once we get to Week 4 and start to make weekly action steps toward using our word in 3 areas of our life, these little things will be super important!

It's also about being true to yourself.  I know a lot of people would suggest not to have limiting beliefs....but I think honesty with yourself is the best policy.  An example I can think of is with my blogging/social media goals.  If I try to do all the right blogging things - ebooks, newsletters, scheduled social media posts, a curated instagram feed, viral pinterest posts, etc etc - I get burnt out.  It feels inauthentic, overwhelming, and I don't feel successful.  With that being said, if something makes you feel unsuccessful at a goal, shift your actions, and be authentic to yourself.  You can do anything you want to....you just may have to do it your own way.  (I feel that a lot of people don't share this...they say 'this is how you do it.' and then you feel down because you aren't doing it that way.  I will be the first to tell you that I am a bit slower to catch on to things and I always have to modify.  There is nothing wrong with that!)

What small actions in your life make you feel good?

xoxo, Moe

Things I don't like about working a 9-5 & running a business

Lately I've been getting a lot of orders for designs both custom & premade.  While I looooove being able to practice design & html/css, etc I find it is sooooo hard to do with a regular 9-5 job.

For example, a little bit ago it was my room mate & best friend's birthday.  It just so happened that I was working on 2 custom designs AND just got orders for 2 premade designs.  While I am pretty speedy at updating & installing the designs, sometimes I get thrown for a loop and other times spontaneous life things get in the way.  In this particular instance a birthday party was planned & (of course) I attended even though I needed to get things done in a timely manner for clients.

Additionally, there are times when I am ignoring Zach because I have to work on something for a client during our skype sessions in order to get it done in a timely manner.  I know this frustrates him.  I think I have the opposite thing to procrastination.  I don't waste time, I just feel I don't have the time to begin with.  Life seems to do this thing where it happens spontaneously.  I can't ask everyone in my life to give me 2 days notice of going out to eat.  Playing with 5 or so after work hours makes me feel like I am not doing my best.

I know I can't say to my friends/boyfriend that me working on this is more important that going out & doing things & I know I can't say to my clients "I've got a birthday party to go to after work so you're gonna have to wait."  I know it is about balance, but even trying to establish better office hours (so to speak) doesn't really work out that well for me.  I try to say to myself my office hours are 6pm-10pm but what if I've got pottery, or kitchen band, or a birthday party?  My 9-5 gets in the way sometimes & I often find myself distracted at work thinking about what I need to do after work in order to feel alright about going out & doing things.

There have been plenty of times where I am sitting on the couch head in laptop while my room mates are watching TV because I want to hang out with them.  There have also been times where I've gotten up & left because I was too distracted by the TV or even told Zach that I have to call him back while I work on something.  I feel like it's unfair to the people in my lives, unfair to me, & unfair to clients with all of these things.

I am excited & nervous as hell about taking any leaps into self employment (even though when I move, I'll be unemployed...sorta) but if I do, there will be more time for me & for others.  I can work 9-5 on my business & then take a break in the evenings.  With Zach traveling so much for work though, I may have more time to put into my business than I thought.

An artist came to do a workshop at school once & he mentioned that in order to be a better artist he needed to turn down his friends.  Which is true, because without practice we don't get better.  But I don't want to outright decline every offer.

Sometimes too I don't think that my friends or my boyfriend understand that I have to do this in order to make money.  Just because I am not making a living off of it doesn't mean it's not important.  I have to work toward my goal of making the blog, the shop, my brand, etc successful.  That means I have to ignore someone at some point, right?  I just wish it could be ignoring them while they are gone!  Zach has mentioned to me that he knows sometimes I am waiting for something to be done so I can work on the blog.  He knows that while I am trying to pay attention to him I am actually hoping he gets distracted so I can do something else.  And I don't like that I do that!

Sometimes on Mondays I get into a really good productive mood of waking up & starting work around 9 from my pjs.  I'll be super productive, getting things done, take a break for lunch, then pick it back up.  I wish everyday could be like this!  One Monday I even surprised myself, I was so impressed.  

Zach is so supportive of me launching into self employment & I couldn't ask for more.  But how do I balance my 'real job' with my 'pretend one'?  I try to be upfront & come up with a time frame for clients...I just wish it could all be done faster!  I don't like to leave people waiting a whole day for an email.  Usually a premade design with installation takes about 3ish days depending on edits & a full blog redesign takes about 2 weeks, depending on the edits, too.  I just don't want to be unavailable, if you can't my drift, to my friends OR clients.

I guess this is just a little post on the fact that I feel like I don't know what I'm doing.  But then again, aren't we all sorta like that? Tell me I'm not crazy!

How do you balance your life? Are there things you feel you must take care of being self employed that you have to turn down your friends & family?

ps.  Don't let this scare you! I am up for custom designs & the turnaround is about 2 weeks.  I love having custom designs because they are challenging.  So shoot me an email if you're interested!

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Trend Tuesday // Pottery Inspiration

So my pottery class has gotten back in to the swing of things & I can't wait to get my hands dirty more! We've had a few classes but my goal for this class is to just be better! I want to make bowls & more tumblers. I also want to make wide serving bowls & focus on glazing.  I want to experiment more with shape too.  I am so excited to be able to think about getting into my home studio! A girl dreams of these things & when they happen she kisses the man that helps her out & runs to play in the mud.

I am so lucky to have such a guy that is so supportive.  I know he sees us as a team but I also appreciate that he wants me to be able to live a dream I've always wanted.  He's said on many occasions that he wants to live in a house with me where we cook dinner served on plates I've made.  How damn fairy tale ending is that?

Here is some inspiration from my Pottery pin board:

one // two // three // four

I love the look of natural clay & really dislike having to cover it up with glazes.  But people buy things that are blue...at least that's what I've noticed.  I loved my clear glaze combination, but that's not seen too much interest & I've been told I need to branch out (even though I don't want to).  Recently, I tried a white glaze that really made the speckles stand out but I'm not sure I like it.  Most recently I did a blue/green combo.  We'll see how I like that.

I struggle a lot with knowing that I am good & have the potential to be great and then the seeming realization that my stuff is worthless.  It is a struggle that I really dislike having with myself.  I find myself on an emotional roller coaster of sorts.  Where I wonder why I am even starting this in the first place, why I was even awarded a degree, & how the heck I could even imagine being successful?  Zach has seem me question myself & wonder why the heck I am even thinking about doing this.  It's been hard letting him see me feel weak.  Then I have a break through in the studio & fall in love with something or meet a goal....only to be discouraged to the fact that I am still not good enough.  I draw so much inspiration & come at it with high hopes that I fulfill, then look around and feel as if it's only been good for me.

Then I think, what does anyone else care? I am growing, I am becoming a better artist.  Look at where I've come from!  I try to remind myself everyday that even little progress is progress made.  Then again I find myself envious of others...a word I don't like using to describe myself.  I don't like to compare myself..it's not helpful...but I find myself wondering why I can't do the same thing others are doing.  It's a low, low point & I feel totally worthless being envious.  It's like a sinking feeling.  I try to avoid envy & encourage others to do the same.  I am getting better about not being green.  I am sure if you look back on all the pottery posts it's a roller coaster of I love this! I suck at this! It's awesome! I'm a failure.

The one thing that is constant is that I just don't give up.  I keep on trying.  I keep on trying new things, I keep making, I keep listing, I keep trying.  I've never been a quitter in fact my first sale was like 2 years after I opened my shop.  It was something that I can't believe I even made, not related to ceramics at all! But trying has gotta pay off sometime right?  I've been semi-successful with blog designs, crocheting, etc...but now I want it to be ceramics!

I have more pottery listed in the shop now, if you're interested in a lovely wheel thrown piece of serving ware.  If you like blue, there's something for you...but if your a clay lover like me there are pieces where they clay shines through.

How do you combat inner struggles?

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