Yes, I am glad to be out but sometimes I reminisce & really miss it! I loooooved my major, loved my friends, & had a grand old time. Taking my Indiana Drivers License test on Tuesday not only set me back about 10 years when I first took the test (have to admit, I needed a review booklet from the lady at the counter!) but also made me realize how stinking glad I am not to take any more tests. College was so fun for me not just because of the regular old college experience but also because I did actually learn a lot - both academically & about myself.
Here are the things I miss:
++ Old room mates & friends who came to visit. Dharma Initiative parties. Dr. Mario competitions. Duck Hunt. LOST & family time.
++ the apartment I lived in Senior & (oh yeah) Super Senior year. Both of them were awesome. In the two bedroom one, my room was huge! Super Senior year, our 4 bedroom one had the honor of displaying a Rock the Block sign secretly dropped in front of our door by a secret society on campus. My room there also over looked main street, was close to the bar & campus and was filled with some cool peeps. (Check out my old roomie's Society6 shop if you don't believe me). I also got to live above some shops......secret dream of mine.
++ That time the italian waiter sang to me & then kissed me in Florence. Don't ever eat Linguini of the Sea if you haven't eaten it before. You'll regret it & then won't eat for a day.
++BFFLs who are now getting or who have already gotten married! What?? I swear every year of college was a different experience for me. It wasn't ever the same. This chick in this picture was the first friend I ever made....now I'm going to be a bridesmaid in her wedding!
++That time a boy broke up with me & I fell apart. Then I cut my hair & became awesome.
++ this is still my favorite picture.
++Back when the campus activities board was coooool.....and not lame. And I made the fliers for concerts, events, etc & practically lived in the student union. And on Halloween a pretty rad professor, Dr. Jordan, would tell the campus ghost stories & I'd be creeped out.
++That time someone called my room mates & I 'not funny' at the aforementioned Halloween Ghost story telling my last year there.
++When there wasn't a Moe's Burritos under my apartment and you had to get nachos & tacos from the pizza place in the student union. Also when there wasn't an Einstein Brother's Bagels & only the coffee shop in the Library. For the life of me, I can't remember what was in Einstein's place in the Student Union.
++ Working until all hours of the night then coming in super early to the art building. Double checking the class schedule so you could work in piece & not with the babies (those that weren't aren't majors or were Freshman).
++That time I cut half my finger off while working on my book binding final. All I could think was 'don't bleed on the book!' I'm sure if there is ever a mishap, your first thought is 'don't bleed on the final!'
++ Realizing that a bad day in the art building is still better than a bad day in the real world. I'd rather be miserable there than be some other major.
++ That time we brought my favorite band Liam & Me to school. I stood in the front row singing all their songs. I'm not ashamed.
++ I am also very thankful, surprisingly, that I didn't have a boyfriend in college.....not for lack of trying! It was a great way to learn about myself & grow without having to worry about someone else. Just me. I should have taken more advantage of it. You know, the whole knowing what I know now.
++ The hope & belief that there truly was a job waiting for you after college. That all the things you're doing are worth it. And that after graduation you'd be successful & not working at someplace like Subway. I really miss that hope.
All of this is sort of leading up to that last one. I've been looking for jobs lately & I am stuck. Literally I don't know what more to do. I've formated my resume in a creative yet professional way to stand out from others. I've used action words to describe my experiences, taken responsibility for my achievements, & (I think) all around represented myself well. But I don't know what more to do to get noticed. I did all the things right. I took the jobs you take in college to prepare your for the real world. I took the fresh out of college jobs where you work hard for little pay & recognition until it pays off in experience. I worked a wonderful job where I was able to learn so much, manage an office, create front desk procedures, use my creative degree, etc. This job paid off in money & in experience......but apparently it means nothing that I managed an office, managed 4 calendars, booked student appointments, organized & maintained student files, recruited & enrolled students, designed a front desk procedure to train others, designed a cohesive look for their school catalog, brochure, etc, ordered supplies, made copies, & attempted to kept everyone's head on straight. I took a receptionist position and turned it into an office management position. But apparently this doesn't mean anything.
What do I do? How do I stand out? What do I say? What more do I include? How do I get employers to consider me?
I guess, for one of the first times in my life, I'm facing the fact that there isn't a right path. I've always been able to find work....any work. But I'm too old to be working a job....I need to start thinking of a career. But all I want to be is an artist. I need some sort of employment that pays for me to do that until I'm on my feet. Something in the Office Management field because it's fun, I can see myself doing it for a while, I like office stuff, & it's a break from being creative. Why would I want to be demanded to be creative by someone else all day? Being creative is something dear to me....I don't want anyone else controlling what I do. But, why can't I find a simple office management job? No one needs their phones answered? No one?
In college there is always a formula. Hell, you can even calculate the items you can miss before you fail a test or even fail a class. How many times have you heard others saying 'if I just get an 85% I'll pass the class' or the like? Heck I went through & calculated which questions I'd thought I'd missed on the Driver's Test so I could figure out if I needed to guess any other answers better. I even used context clues to figure out the answer to one question based on the other questions on the test.
In real life there's no context clues. You just gotta do stuff. And it's this stuff that I don't know how to do. I honestly, truly have no idea what more I can do to be hirable. I've thought well 'what if I go back to school?' Then I'll graduate again, with even more debt, & still no job....oh, & there are tests aren't there. Wonderful, right?
So, I don't know what to do. I really, really don't.
Oh, and I changed my blog design...again. I'm so indecisive! I can't find anything that just says me.